Labour of love

I had a very emotional conversation with a relative last night. I have looked up to her all my life. She is tremendously beautiful, towering and slender! She is remarkably intelligent and versatile and FREAKIN PERFECT! Of course she is extremely successful at her career and lives in my dream city, doing fabulous things. So it was pretty strange to her her say that  I inspire her! "Say what?"

I'm sure that I have spoken about this before, but I cannot articulate it enough; how trying it is to pursue Fashion and Art in our society. This cousin of mine says she opted to take the safe route. She is a Chemical Engineer and has a really gratifying and secure career. Her life couldn't be better, but there is always that lingering "what if" when she thinks about the dreams she gave up. I can tell you "what if"- you'd be broke and frustrated! LOL. Just kidding (or am i?)

We live in a society where if you're not a Doctor nor Lawyer you are nobody. People discredit Art scholars and turn their noses up at people who work with their hands. I spend my energy behind defending what I do, while simultaneously trying to assert my intellect and prove that I do have a brain after all. If only I had a dollar for every time someone said to me "It would have been so good if you had done Pharmacology like your father", or "But you were so bright in school! You could have been a big lawyer." Ugh.

                                 

Found this charming little message in my chocolate wrapper today. Thought it fit what I was feeling :)

Doing what you love is not the fantasy is claims to be. It is a lot of confidence and willpower- It is telling yourself everyday that this is what you were meant for even though you feel stagnant. It is about breaking down walls with your own hands, because the path has not been cleared for you. It is about teaching yourself those lessons that people have to find in books and quotes. It is the biggest risk you would ever take. It is scary beyond any fear- you are fundamentally jumping blindly into deep waters and you have yet to learn to swim
                                     

I know that I was meant to be an artist. My canvas has always been strapped on to my back. I get lost in words and clothes and feelings. Creating beauty and inspiring women is part of who I am. To live this love as a career in a society where people are so hard and closed up; well, therein lies an arduous mission.